That used to be a simple innocuous saying.. now such a loaded statement. I don’t know what to say..
A year ago I was just a mom.. then a little after noon I became a mom to child with a terminal brain tumor.
We should be blowing up balloons. We should be telling her to stay in her room so she doesn’t ruin her surprises. Her brothers should be getting the chance to decorate for her.
Instead we are in a hotel.. running hard and fast from the truth that haunts us.
Tomorrow she is truly and completely forever 6.
Because when you don’t turn 7 what else is there?
Happy forever 6th birthday buggers
She should be blowing out 7 candles..opening presents.. and feeling extra special for the day. We should be getting to show her our love in lots of little ways.
Instead we are doing it for them because of her. And for the first time I am using those words with them. Letting them see ways they can .. we can .. still connect with their big sister. Hopefully teaching them something they can hold onto throughout their lives.. a way to connect with the best in themselves and give that to other people.
And I invite you to do the same. For them because of her.
Whoever you want your ‘them’ to be, it can be a friend or your neighbor. It can be a stranger in the store or your child’s teacher.. It can be your own children or your parents. Maybe you will choose another family in the middle of the unfair fight of their child’s life..Or if you are so inclined it can be Unravel/my family and the lives I promise we will impact. The options are endless as are the amount of times you can do it on the first of her forever 6th birthdays. Oct 28th ..
i hate not having you here
i so desperately wish this wasn’t us
all this heartache
all this despair
7 years ago
if i had a choice
i would do it all over again
…until there is a cure..