Camp Okizu. What a gift this place is to families impacted by pediatric cancer. . From the child themselves to the parents to the siblings.. something individual and special for each and everyone. As soon as I got back from Seattle it was time to jump ion the car and drive to our family bereavement […]
I rarely share photos of the signs we get.. but wanted to share the one above. It was the night before her birthday. A night Tony and I should have been planning ways to show her our love for her.. Instead she sent us her love.. some from Mommy and some for Daddy. Our birthday […]
Happy birthday. That used to be a simple innocuous saying.. now such a loaded statement. I don’t know what to say.. A year ago I was just a mom.. then a little after noon I became a mom to child with a terminal brain tumor. Jennifer We should be blowing up balloons. We should […]
We had a wonderful anniversary trip. We walked and spent time together.. and we struggled and we fought as we tried to figure out how to navigate missing the same 6 year old girl in such vastly different ways. I need to talk about her. About all the memories and the moments. Tony needs to […]
Sometimes the empty is so consuming, sometimes the reality that she is gone slaps me. Sometimes my ache for her is more subtle.. and another persons wound more crucial to attend to. This weekend was a bit of both. We went camping… without her… well without all of her. I had the keepsake of her […]
We had a good trip. I think in part because I did so much hard grieving before we left. The 3 days leading up to the trip were pretty miserable for me … and in turn my kids and husband. My family drives my bonkers sometimes. I get my feelings hurt.. and I am sure […]
I find myself back to a place where I have a longing for my nights to come and write. I don’t know if I am in a transitional period or if it is just a hard spot for me right now. I am brimming with emotions lately.. anger and sadness.. and a sharp desperate ache […]
Memories are all I have left.. Its what us bereaved parents cling to. but when they hit unexpectedly it can be devastating. I feel like I have been hit over and over again today, and I feel so weak. I rarely leave the house to run errands anymore. Her memory seems to haunt me everywhere […]
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