You know that feeling when you have on pants that are too tight.. (really I want to say bra but trying to make this applicable to the handful of guys that might read this) .. How at first its just a little uncomfortable… Maybe you yank on them to unsuccessfully try to loosen them.. Or […]
final blog continued from this entry.. I love you. I screw up with you guys. I know that. I have all these plans and thoughts in my heads of how I am going to do and be so much better. And I screw it up. Lately its been because I have been scared. Its hard […]
..continued from this blog.. which is continued from this one. I love you. I miss you. Its hard to feel both of those things. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m not always strong enough to do that. Do you know how sorry I am? I have so much I would have done differently for you at […]
… continued from this post… How is it possible? How is it real that she has been gone for almost 5 years. Why? I know I know I know. We aren’t supposed to ask that. I am supposed to trust in your reasons. I’m not supposed to wish it to be anybody but mine. I […]
4 years. When you become a parent time becomes so flexible.. You can look at your 4 year old and feel like they are still so little.. yet be completely unable to remember life without them.. My guess is that never changes?? I think that maybe even my Mom looks at me like that.. However, […]
Sometimes we resist what we know.. this blog is really just a continuation of this one.. And sometimes urges and pushes are so strong we cannot ignore them.. I pulled the boys out of school and took them on a mommy and boys date to the movies. Coco. None of us had seen it… it […]
Whats it like? What’s it like to be you? I see it. I think that is probably the number 1 question I see burning behind people’s eyes that is never asked. Though it’s hinted to… in the escape of words like I can’t imagine. .. So I’ll tell you.. It’s showing up to drop my […]
Its February. Its here. This month that fills me with such dread.. Its here. And with her she brings my old friend.. Grief. True. Utter. Grief. Grief that hollows me out. This friend. The one I can’t remember not knowing, yet somewhere along the line, I was able to put in some separation.. Able to […]
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