I miss her. Last night we had a bereaved family over for dinner. They also lost their eldest daughter. It was incredible to be able to talk about soccer in one breathe and each of our daughters ashes in the next. Foods we like to eat and how they spend their daughters anniversary/birthday each year. […]
Rage … thats my current. My right now, this very moment feeling. I had Tony take the boys to out of the house because I feel like I want to rip the house apart. I went for a run this morning. Good run with good music playing in my ears. I got home and stopped […]
This grief. Its so different than I thought it would be. Its so different than any other grief I have ever experienced. One where the color can break through. . . This time it doesn’t. .. I have my doubt that it ever truly will. Tony and I talked about this on our trip. How […]
****I mentioned before we had really really spotty service on our trip so I didn’t blog but took notes on my phone what I was thinking/feeling**** Our trip was lovely. Truly a escape and so wonderful to be with just the baby and my husband.. but the dark hit hard coming home. I wish […]
**service is spotty.. this is from Wednesday..no post tonight** The rain returned today. Before we left Tony dropped my car off at a local place to be looked it and then packed up his car.. We were a bit behind on our departure schedule.. but the bonus was I got to go for a run. […]
We leave tomorrow for our trip…hopefully. Car troubles tonight. Nothing a little duct tape can’t fix though! ..yikes .. . wish everything was that simple. Its almost midnite for us. Just got the kids all into bed.. long night. But lucky to have my sister and nephews watching the 2 little ones and another nephew […]
***Write down the time. Seriously right now look at the clock and write it down. **** This blog is my lifeline. My connection to her. Its been a wonderful way to keep her alive for me. At night I pour over videos ABCs and pictures of her. Getting to re-live our lives with her over and […]
I confuse myself. I was watching a show with the teenager getting teased. I had already worked myself into a frenzy about that happening to Jennifer when she started kindergarten. I was so worried about not being there for her so many hours a day. What I wouldn’t give for that now. To be […]
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