Music moves me…music permeated today… this song is the theme song for the first half of today… 2 months come… and gone.. This morning was really hard for me. We drove to Monterey… to be near the ocean and eat breakfast at a little place we really enjoy. Last time we were there was about a […]
2 months ago.. I was holding her. feeling her heartbeat…hard and fast… Tomorrow 2 months ago that beautiful heart finally succumb… stopped beating. The distance between me and her life grows…every time I go to bed another day is added allowing the gap between our time together to grow…but also a day closer to reuniting […]
I’m kicking…as hard as I can… trying to not sink under. . 2 months is looming… pulling me down. . This week has been leading me this direction.. today was a day where I felt like it has taken everything in me to not give in.. to not be swept away.. I had to keep […]
Another Wednesday.. means another week has passed. .. 8 week in total since I held her and felt her. I spoke with somebody tonight about what that time was like.. those last 36 hours with her. Lying in her room with her. I knew she was dying.. knew she would be gone forever. I had […]
Its another one of those nights that my mind is in a jumble. I feel like I miss one night of blogging and my mind starts to race a million miles.. . .. shattered and scattered. I am weighing all our options for how to best make a impact in fight against pediatric cancer.. should […]
I had found out about a fundraiser earlier in the week that was happening tonight. Another family lost their beautiful daughter to the DIPG beast and started a foundation a few years back. good people doing good things <– check them out! They welcomed my mom and I and baby Charlotte to attend. I debated until […]
New day… new goodbye. Its starting to feel like everyday there are new ways I am saying goodbye to her. .. over and over again. Yesterday, friday, I picked Jonathan up from school. Right before I left to get him we got a email to approve her headstone. I like… well I like it enough […]
I miss her. Last night we had a bereaved family over for dinner. They also lost their eldest daughter. It was incredible to be able to talk about soccer in one breathe and each of our daughters ashes in the next. Foods we like to eat and how they spend their daughters anniversary/birthday each year. […]
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