Jennifer was a water baby from the very beginning. She always loved the beach and just being in and near the water. I always feel closer to her again being near the ocean. .. We got back today from a few days at a rented beach house with my sisters family and my mom. Tony […]
When we get close to home I have a silly tradition that we will call out to whoever is waiting for us that we are on our way. Today it was just me and Charlotte and I started the call.. I called them one by one.. Daddddyyy and she would echo me..then Bubbassss ..and Brotherrr […]
“Me time”. I cannot believe how much that saying has changed. For me now my me time truly consists of grieving my daughter, often in front of a computer screen. Funeral, wedding and hospital visits.. and a few great Unravel meetings have left little “me” time.. though. Last week I ended up in L&D with […]
“At rest, quicksand thickens with time, but it remains very sensitive to small variations in stress. At higher stresses, quicksand liquefies very quickly, and the higher the stress the more fluid it becomes. This causes a trapped body to sink..” national geographic Quicksand .. an analogy I googled mid post and realized was so perfect […]
Everything is so different in our lives now. From the little things to the big things. Obvious changes to one I never would have predicted. Like right now I am sitting in a hotel room all by myself… 8 months pregnant with baby #5, (who happens to be giving me raging heartburn) because I am […]
I started cleaning out her room. I think just getting out my fears and my emotions in the last blog readied me to do it. I had thought of it all.. balanced mine and Tonys dueling emotions. I haven’t cried like this is a long time. Day after day of intense crying. I think now […]
Her bed. Well it was really our bed. Me and her. We shared some horribly beautiful nights in that bed. At first we borrowed a futon. But a death bed for your six year old isn’t the kind of thing you borrow. We needed a new one. Comfortable enough for her to die in.. big […]
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