Tag: pediatric cancer facts

what she said

I am not alone in this. So much of what I feel other parents are also feeling. This is what my friend Kristine wrote on the McKenna Claire Foundations FB page yesterday “We are on a major organizational binge at our house. Our life has been chaos since the day McKenna was diagnosed, which will be 4 years in January. I was cleaning out bags of “stuff” that have been piled in corners of closets or dressers. What I found this morning is what you see pictured above. This was McKenna’s final Mother’s Day gift to me. It was not lost on me thatit was covered in butterflies and that the gift itself was a blue butterfly keychain. What undid me was what she wrote on the back. Reading her words, written in her shaky post-tumor writing, brought back every ounce of the hopelessness, guilt, and pain that I have[…]

20 weeks

We got the mission statement completed. I should feel happy. I should feel relieved. One thing off my plate. .. But all I can think is 20 weeks. Tomorrow is 20 weeks. .. I have never been so sad. I never knew sadness could permeate to these depths of a person without destroying them. I hurt. I ache with such a fierceness I feel like I might be ripped apart from the inside out.   20 weeks.. why? Why did this happen? Why are we allowing it to still happen to 7 more kids today.. and 7 more tomorrow.  I have people from our glitter squad calling Senator’s offices to ask for the specific aide by title that we should write to about the lack of funding. And you know what some offices are saying.. No. We won’t give out there email address! I am so frustrated, disappointed, angry ..[…]

rear view mirror

I don’t want to write tonight.. I don’t want to go there.. here. To remember where I was 4 months ago tonight. Steeling myself for the something so strong .. it dissolves steel. It started to hit this morning.. driving to a friends house I cried silent.. tears… but since then I have run from the truth that haunts me .. I cried angry tears and sad tears.. Relay for life is soon to happen in my town. Driving I saw the purple ribbons everywhere.. I wish I had no connection to it…I wish it didn’t impact me like it does. It made me feel stupid looking at them. . How I had been tricked into thinking that the money raised was for all cancers.. pediatric and adult when in reality it is unproprtionaly split towards adult cancer. 1 cent of every dollar goes towards pediatrics (PAC2) A worthy organization[…]

…but not really

Looking through the pictures for that last post really got to me.. About what pediatric cancer really looks like.. Its not just bald kids.. or swollen faces. Or feeding tubes and barf bags.. Often times there is something even worse that all of that.. being left behind.                 And then I get really angry. This is not the way its supposed to be. It is not the way it has to be. 60 kids were on that stage this morning. In just over a week. 8.5 days. That many children will die from cancer in this country.   7 a day. It is not rare. I am not alone. Far from it. Cancer is the number one disease killer of children. (national cancer institute) It is the number two killer of our kids. Number one is accidents.. which is such a broad term so[…]