Tag: blogging

hardest

Another Wednesday.. means another week has passed. .. 8 week in total since I held her and felt her. I spoke with somebody tonight about what that time was like.. those last 36 hours with her. Lying in her room with her. I knew she was dying.. knew she would be gone forever. I had no idea what that really meant. What that really looked like and felt like. It surprises me…constantly on this journey.. How hard it is.. I knew it would be the hardest thing I ever had to do. I mean I thought I really really knew and understood.. was prepared. “hardest” doesn’t even begin to so it justice… not even scratch the surface. Its like a tornado of all the “hardest” I could ever imagine feeling..deafening sounds..whistling in my ears.. I feel like much of my day is spent in “the calm before the storm”. ..[…]