I had a ok day today… ..then I got on FB and we turned on the TV. Totally stupid on my part. The reason I stay home all the time is I am comfortable…and in control. Yet I let this outside source impact me tonight. A year ago Jennifer and Tony walked to the […]
**this is a blessing of a blog for me tonight. Through writing tonight I made some huge connections(so please excuse the jumbled thoughts…and thank you for continuing to ride a long with me*** Illusion. Sesame street has a word on the street….well that’s my word on the Kranz boulevard. Its like I cannot absorb […]
This morning I did not want to get out of bed…I felt too heavy to move. I am lucky. Tony got up with the kids and let me lay in bed a bit longer. I think I might have stayed in bed all day..but we had art therepy coming over for our boys. Currently its […]
I was out of the house all day. Lesson learned….it was far too long. I feel like I need to re-set my body and mind. Get settled in again with myself…. We went to the cemetery this morning. We picked her plot…the plot..that one day.. . . hopefully sooner rather than later I will share […]
Tomorrow (well technically today) we go back to the cemetery. Tonight I watch videos of her…and I miss her… beyond words… glitter shoot team Jennifer
Darkness…I have swallowed it in. There is a difference between wanting to die and wanting to kill yourself. I never knew that before. …now I know it. Now I live it. or rather am barely surviving it. And I feel lucky that Tony can totally understand it. Because right now the tears are so strong […]
It has been a week since your services. So tonight Charlotte and I went through all the letters..those tangible expressions of love. I waited since it was the final part of that day..that beautifully tragic day. The death of your child. Its splinters and rips at all areas of our lives. Changes so much of […]
I parented…I mean like really parented her up until the 10 days before she died. I am reminded everyday I walk by the sticker chart I made her right before we left for our make a wish trip. I’m glad I did that. I remember my mom saying to me (before we knew it would […]
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