Month: April 2016

toxic showers

Please read this post. Its not by me. Its by another mother. Explaining why her daughter has to have showers in the middle of the night. Read this post and really let it absorb.. think about what this agent must be doing to her insides .. This isn’t rare.. this isn’t a unique case. In childhood cancer.. this just IS.. but it doesn’t have to be. It shouldn’t be. We aren’t just in pursuit for a cure. .. we are in pursuit for better treatment options. Imagine this was a child you love. Please.. read this post republished here from Fight for our kids.. Let sweet strong Elayna be your her… Let’s make the future different. … #forTHEMbecauseofher ********************************************************************* TOXIC: I’m getting a lot of questions about this last high dose chemo and the showers and realizing that it’s hard to understand why it’s such a big deal. It[…]


Life moves so quickly sometimes. I thought while I was in New York I would carve out time to blog, but we were so busy I didn’t. And then coming home I have just been trying to get the house stuff and kids in order. So for those that don’t follow on Facebook (and if you don’t you should!) Tony, Bridgette and I went to New York to give money to a few labs as well as meet with additional ones we are considering funding and a few other East Coast foundations. I went through a lot of surprising emotions on the trip.. Just even being there was bittersweet. Its always been a dream of mine to visit New York. But we chose to have me be a stay at home mom and figured there would be no reason to travel that way for a long time. Then Jennifer got[…]

counting heads

I think all moms will get this.. but certainly moms of bigger families. We count. 1,2,3,4.. Leaving places.. in the middle of places. . we count to be sure we have all of our little chicks accounted for. I think its automatic, we aren’t even aware its happening.. like a counting program running in the background. But when that number is off all other systems shut down and an alarm sounds. One is missing. That happened all the time after she died. I was still counting for 4.. then when the count was only 3 my heart would race.. my eyes would automatically start darting around. And I would hurt so much that moment later realizing over and over again I was back to only counting for 3. .. I don’t know when I stopped. Part of me can’t believe I stopped.. and I feel guilty that I ever did[…]